I woke up this morning feeling a little puzzled.
All of sudden, a certain part of my brain has decided to play oldies out of the blue.
Some memories from my past, randomly & intensely bubbling on my mind from the moment I opened my eyes.
It's weird, since I'm a kind of 'present' people.
I don't like living in the past. I let everything that happened in the past become either a sweet memory or a lesson. But I never let my past become a shadow in my present time.
I hardly looking back over my shoulder, have no regrets, never watch the same movies twice, always look and moving forward.
What has been done, it can not be undone. The only thing I would do is learn from my mistake and do better next time.
I don't know why my brain having a time travel this morning, in fact I'm lack of sleep because of my stomach hurts so bad all night long.
Well I guess, no body knows how it works. Sometimes its just happen, just like a dream blooming in your sleep.
Friday, June 22, 2012
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Time flies. It's been almost a half year, since the last time I posted a note on this blog.
Been there, done that. I traveled a lot in the past 6 months.
From the south to the north. From the east to the west.
Literally and emotionally.
I'm blessed, having a chance to see so many beautiful places around the world.
I'm lucky, having a chance to try so many delicious food around the world.
From macaroons in France, pasta in Italy, paella in Spain, bratwurst in Germany, xiao long bao in China, hamburgers in USA, gyros in Greece, to crispy duck in Ubud.
One thing I've learned from those amazing journeys is always live in the present.
Cherish the moment, taste every bite of the food that you put into your mouth, enjoy what's on your plate, take a deep breath, exhale slowly, fully engaged into the 'NOW', and forget the rest.
Life is a short journey. Be a light traveler.
Never bring your 'past' luggage into the present.
Takes in only what's the most matter thing to you.
Let go of the rest.
Detach yourself from anything that can hold you back.
Enjoy your precious life, now.
Friday, January 13, 2012
Catatan hati di awal 2012
Sore ini, di akhir minggu kedua di awal tahun 2012.
Di temani hujan yang terus menerus mengguyur bumi selama beberapa hari terakhir ini, aku menyesap kopi ku perlahan, menikmati buih krimer yang lembut nya menghangati bibir dan rongga mulut ku.
Meresapi setiap jengkal perjalanan kopi itu yang membawa kehangatan di tubuh ku yang meringkuk kedinginan. Menenggelamkan diri dalam pelukan sofa empuk, berharap mampu mengusir dingin yang mulai merambati hari.
Sore ini, di sebuah sudut kedai kopi kesayangan ku.
Yang kerap ku datangi, baik hanya untuk sekedar menikmati waktu yang bergulir di temani aroma kopi hangat dan kayu manis kesukaan ku maupun bertemu orang-orang yang ku kasihi, berbagi kisah kehidupan, ataupun hanya sekedar menghabiskan halaman demi halaman dari buku yang sedang ku baca.
Sore ini, aku mengamati butiran air hujan yang membasahi kaca jendela kedai kopi ini. Sesekali mengamati gerak langkah manusia-manusia yang berderap cepat, mengerutkan kening, melipat kedua tangan di dada, mengatupkan bibir, entah kedinginan entah kelelahan entah banyak pikiran. Tak urung, aku pun tersenyum. Sendiri. Membayangkan skenario-skenario yang terjadi di dalam kehidupan manusia yang tengah aku amati. Hidup itu misteri. Banyak tanya yang hadir di dalam kehidupan manusia. Banyak kabut yang terkadang muncul menghalangi keyakinan. Namun yang terpenting bahwa hidup itu anugerah. Anugerah yang harus senantiasa kita syukuri. Anugerah yang begitu indah yang seringkali lupa kita nikmati dan luput dari kesadaran kita, manusia-manusia robot.
Sore ini, di awal tahun 2012.
Hampir genap 36 tahun aku menikmati perjalanan kehidupan ku di dunia ini. Perjalanan yang cukup panjang bila di banding kan dengan usia keponakan ku yang baru satu digit. Perjalanan yang masih panjang bila di banding kan dengan usia orang tua ku.
Sungguh mengagumkan bagaimana terkadang waktu terasa begitu lambat berjalan, dan tiba-tiba kita terbangun, menengok ke puluhan tahun yang tiba-tiba sudah berlalu dan berada di belakang kita. Hidup itu memang relatif. :)
Relatif mudah dan menyenangkan. Relatif sulit dan melelahkan.
Relatif indah dan relatif buram. Tergantung dari sisi mana kita memilih untuk melihat nya.
Sore ini, di sebuah perjalanan kehidupan.
Aku bersyukur akan hidup ku yang penuh dengan warna dan rasa.
Warna yang kadang cerah, kadang suram. Rasa yang kadang suka, kadang duka. Karena setiap warna dan rasa yang hadir dalam kehidupan ku, mampu menghasilkan suatu karya seni yang menakjubkan.
Yang ku perlukan hanyalah, mundur sejenak, melihat dan mengamati lukisan kehidupan ku dari jauh. Semarak penuh warna dan rasa.
Dan itu indah.
Tidak ada resolusi tahun baru yang aku buat.
I am grateful and thankful to be alive. And I will keep living my life to the fullest.
Di temani hujan yang terus menerus mengguyur bumi selama beberapa hari terakhir ini, aku menyesap kopi ku perlahan, menikmati buih krimer yang lembut nya menghangati bibir dan rongga mulut ku.
Meresapi setiap jengkal perjalanan kopi itu yang membawa kehangatan di tubuh ku yang meringkuk kedinginan. Menenggelamkan diri dalam pelukan sofa empuk, berharap mampu mengusir dingin yang mulai merambati hari.
Sore ini, di sebuah sudut kedai kopi kesayangan ku.
Yang kerap ku datangi, baik hanya untuk sekedar menikmati waktu yang bergulir di temani aroma kopi hangat dan kayu manis kesukaan ku maupun bertemu orang-orang yang ku kasihi, berbagi kisah kehidupan, ataupun hanya sekedar menghabiskan halaman demi halaman dari buku yang sedang ku baca.
Sore ini, aku mengamati butiran air hujan yang membasahi kaca jendela kedai kopi ini. Sesekali mengamati gerak langkah manusia-manusia yang berderap cepat, mengerutkan kening, melipat kedua tangan di dada, mengatupkan bibir, entah kedinginan entah kelelahan entah banyak pikiran. Tak urung, aku pun tersenyum. Sendiri. Membayangkan skenario-skenario yang terjadi di dalam kehidupan manusia yang tengah aku amati. Hidup itu misteri. Banyak tanya yang hadir di dalam kehidupan manusia. Banyak kabut yang terkadang muncul menghalangi keyakinan. Namun yang terpenting bahwa hidup itu anugerah. Anugerah yang harus senantiasa kita syukuri. Anugerah yang begitu indah yang seringkali lupa kita nikmati dan luput dari kesadaran kita, manusia-manusia robot.
Sore ini, di awal tahun 2012.
Hampir genap 36 tahun aku menikmati perjalanan kehidupan ku di dunia ini. Perjalanan yang cukup panjang bila di banding kan dengan usia keponakan ku yang baru satu digit. Perjalanan yang masih panjang bila di banding kan dengan usia orang tua ku.
Sungguh mengagumkan bagaimana terkadang waktu terasa begitu lambat berjalan, dan tiba-tiba kita terbangun, menengok ke puluhan tahun yang tiba-tiba sudah berlalu dan berada di belakang kita. Hidup itu memang relatif. :)
Relatif mudah dan menyenangkan. Relatif sulit dan melelahkan.
Relatif indah dan relatif buram. Tergantung dari sisi mana kita memilih untuk melihat nya.
Sore ini, di sebuah perjalanan kehidupan.
Aku bersyukur akan hidup ku yang penuh dengan warna dan rasa.
Warna yang kadang cerah, kadang suram. Rasa yang kadang suka, kadang duka. Karena setiap warna dan rasa yang hadir dalam kehidupan ku, mampu menghasilkan suatu karya seni yang menakjubkan.
Yang ku perlukan hanyalah, mundur sejenak, melihat dan mengamati lukisan kehidupan ku dari jauh. Semarak penuh warna dan rasa.
Dan itu indah.
Tidak ada resolusi tahun baru yang aku buat.
I am grateful and thankful to be alive. And I will keep living my life to the fullest.
Tuesday, September 06, 2011
August
August has always been my most favorite month of the year.
Not only because I was born on August 28th, but it also because August is when my most favorite season has begun.
Autumn or fall season is my favorite time of the year especially when I lived in Germany.
For some reason I’ve always sentimentalized this season.
There's something so beautiful, romantic and mysterious about it.
The colors of trees, the falling golden leaves, the sunny days with chilly breeze, the smell of wet leaves, the romance of the gray sky, the wistfulness of the shorter days, the melancholy feeling that always came out to the surface whenever I walked down at the Promenade alone with those crisp leaves.
Gosh, how I missed those moments...
Since I moved back to Jakarta, I still loves autumn. I found another version of fall season here, with its own beauty. The falling leaves, the smells of Gardenia, the chirping birds, the splash of rain during a very hot days, the gray sky, and sometimes when I'm lucky a chilly breeze.
So last week was my birthday. I am 35 years old now.
Time is flying by really fast.
Right on my birthday, I had a very deep contemplation about my life. About 35 years that passed me by and would never come back.
35 years of my life.
Indeed, I am so lucky to be alive.
I am so grateful, having a lovely family that always been there around me since the moment I was born.
I thank God, for all the blessings that I've been given during 35 years of my life.
Every morning when I wake up, I always thank God that I am still breathing and having another chance to enjoy His precious gift, the life itself.
I am fully aware that life is a present from God.
That's why I always living my life to the fullest.
Cherish every moment of my life, with it all ups and downs.
And right before I blow away my candle, I've come to my senses...
Looking at those 35 candles, I realized that I have already been walking down at least the half of my circle of life.
I don't remember when exactly it's start, but I always imagined that life is like a circle, like a clock, that always ticking and move forward. It's true that we never know when it will end, but let's just assuming that we've been given a full circle to live our life so it means I've reached the middle point of the circle.
Honestly, I was scared. Not because I feel old and afraid to die.
No, not at all. I always celebrate my age. I'm not kind of people who don't want telling their real age. I'm proud with who I am, including the year I was born. :)) And I'm not afraid to die, because I know that we have no power at all to add one single day in our life. We belong to God. And whenever He decide to call us back, there's nothing we can do to prevent it.
All we can do is living our life to the fullest while we're still breathing.
I was scared because I was thinking about my parents.
Thinking about the circle of life, I'm so afraid of losing them.
I love my parents so much. And I couldn't bear in mind the fact that one day they will gone to heaven.
I am so grateful that I still have a chance to spend the time with my parents now, and I thank God for that.
And I pray every single time, that God will always bless my parents with a good health, happiness, peace of mind, and a long life.
Every morning when I wake up, I always thank God that I am still breathing and having another chance to enjoy His precious gift, the life itself.
I am fully aware that life is a present from God.
That's why I always living my life to the fullest.
Cherish every moment of my life, with it all ups and downs.
And right before I blow away my candle, I've come to my senses...
Looking at those 35 candles, I realized that I have already been walking down at least the half of my circle of life.
I don't remember when exactly it's start, but I always imagined that life is like a circle, like a clock, that always ticking and move forward. It's true that we never know when it will end, but let's just assuming that we've been given a full circle to live our life so it means I've reached the middle point of the circle.
Honestly, I was scared. Not because I feel old and afraid to die.
No, not at all. I always celebrate my age. I'm not kind of people who don't want telling their real age. I'm proud with who I am, including the year I was born. :)) And I'm not afraid to die, because I know that we have no power at all to add one single day in our life. We belong to God. And whenever He decide to call us back, there's nothing we can do to prevent it.
All we can do is living our life to the fullest while we're still breathing.
I was scared because I was thinking about my parents.
Thinking about the circle of life, I'm so afraid of losing them.
I love my parents so much. And I couldn't bear in mind the fact that one day they will gone to heaven.
I am so grateful that I still have a chance to spend the time with my parents now, and I thank God for that.
And I pray every single time, that God will always bless my parents with a good health, happiness, peace of mind, and a long life.
My Next Thirty Years
I think I’ll take a moment, celebrate my age
The ending of an era and the turning of a page
Now it’s time to focus in on where I go from here
Lord have mercy on my next thirty years
Hey my next thirty years I’m gonna have some fun
Try to forget about all the crazy things I’ve done
Maybe now I’ve conquered all my adolescent fears
And I’ll do it better in my next thirty years
My next thirty years I’m gonna settle all the scores
Cry a little less, laugh a little more
Find a world of happiness without the hate and fear
Figure out just what I’m doing here
In my next thirty years
Oh my next thirty years, I’m gonna watch my weight
Eat a few more salads and not stay up so late
Drink a little lemonade and not so many beers
Maybe I’ll remember my next thirty years
My next thirty years will be the best years of my life
Raise a little family and hang out with my husband
Spend precious moments with the ones that I hold dear
Make up for lost time here ,In my next thirty years
In my next thirty years...
I think I’ll take a moment, celebrate my age
The ending of an era and the turning of a page
Now it’s time to focus in on where I go from here
Lord have mercy on my next thirty years
Hey my next thirty years I’m gonna have some fun
Try to forget about all the crazy things I’ve done
Maybe now I’ve conquered all my adolescent fears
And I’ll do it better in my next thirty years
My next thirty years I’m gonna settle all the scores
Cry a little less, laugh a little more
Find a world of happiness without the hate and fear
Figure out just what I’m doing here
In my next thirty years
Oh my next thirty years, I’m gonna watch my weight
Eat a few more salads and not stay up so late
Drink a little lemonade and not so many beers
Maybe I’ll remember my next thirty years
My next thirty years will be the best years of my life
Raise a little family and hang out with my husband
Spend precious moments with the ones that I hold dear
Make up for lost time here ,In my next thirty years
In my next thirty years...
Sunday, September 04, 2011
September
Footfalls echo in the memory
Down the passage which we did not take
Towards the door we never opened into
... the rose garden.
-T.S. Eliot-
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